


Memories

by BenThighway



Category: EastEnders (TV)
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-02-22
Updated: 2020-02-23
Packaged: 2021-02-28 09:15:24
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 4
Words: 2,870
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22847740
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/BenThighway/pseuds/BenThighway
Summary: A re-write of the Ballum reunion
Relationships: Callum "Halfway" Highway/Ben Mitchell
Kudos: 32





	1. Chapter 1

Louise took herself to her room, put Peggy to bed and led her to bed, knowing sleep was not going to come easy. Staring up at her ceiling, she attempted to get her mind of Keanu and instead went over what Ben said, more specifically what he said about Callum.   
She has known her brother for long enough to know when he is hurting and being able to see through his hard man persona at least a little bit. He has been broken. Everyone else is saying it's his fault, he broke up with callum, it was his choice and he needs to deal with the consequences and she does agree but also understands the reasons behind it. She knows first hand how much Ben craves their dad's approval and how even though he hasn't been a good dad to him, he still doesn't want to see him drink himself to death.   
Before she could think, she was creeping downstairs and trying to unlock her big brother's phone. After a few attempts, she was scrolling through his contacts. As quick as she went down she was back up, Callums number stuck in her head. She thought about what she was about to do a few times over before plugging his number into her phone and pressing the call button.   
"Hey, Callum! Its Louise. I need to talk to you." "Oh, louise, hi! What is it? It's quite late and you've got peggy ''Trust me, it's important ``''Go on?" "It's about Ben" There was a moment of silence that was soon broken by a barely audible Callum "Louise, he made his decision and as much as I love him and want to be with him, I can't do anything right now" "No, no, no callum. He does loves you alright?" "That's not what he said on christmas eve" "Because it's Ben and we both know he doesn't know how to process someone else loving him. Listen, you two have done so much to get to where you were and you can't give that up now. I have lost keanu forever and what he did was not right but that doesnt mean I didn't love him. He meant the world to me and now he is gone. What you two had no have is so special and you can't throw it down the pan." "But what am I meant to do Louise? He seems perfectly okay to let me go" "That's the thing, he isn't okay. I really shouldn't be telling you this but tonight we talked. He said that he tries not to think about you but he can't. If you were it would make it so much harder for him that how hard it is now. He is breaking, Callum. You owe him nothing but if he goes off the rails again what's going to happen to Lexi? It's not just him that misses you, it's all of us. We have all tried to talk to him but he wont listen. He listened to you before, didn't he? If you come back he will have to own up to what he has done and fix it." There was another silence. "Callum?" "I'll come" "Wait, seriously?" "I can't just stay here knowing he is going off the rails like he was before, I love him too much" "Thank you so much! When will you be here?" "I'll catch a train for monday, see you then, bye Lou" "Bye callum"


	2. Welcome home

The next morning, Lou woke up and forgot she had called callum until she checked her phone to see a message from him saying 'train is booked x'. She got butterflies and was excited, she loves her brother so much and wants to see him happy.   
Monday 13th January 2020 The train into walford came screeching into the stop and opened its doors. A 20 day older Callum walked into the station with slight stubble, a big slung on his shoulder and a mission; to get Ben back. He looked out onto the square that seemed unchanged since he had left but in truth, the lives of many of its inhabitants had changed forever in the space of a few days. It was mid day so the streets were filled as always with stall holders and people off to get food for their break but amongst the busy walford residents, Callums eyes were drawn to one particular individual. Ben Mitchell. He walked through the streets but not in his selection of work outfits, but a pair of grey joggers and an oversized, white top. Callums top. He disappeared into the crowd with his pint of milk in hand. Callum so desperately wanted to walk over in his direction and force him to admit the truth but he knew he couldn't. Instead, he opted to walk back to his flat, drop off his stuff and make a plan of action.   
He arrived at the flat and closed the door. No one had noticed him, to his knowledge, and he was slightly grateful that he could just get home without being asked a million questions. It was then his phone went off. As he rummaged through his bag and coat to locate his phone, he stumbled across a small, white box but instead of opening it or putting away, he shoved it into his coat and retrieved his phone. For the first time in what felt like ages, was Ben named sprawled across the top of his screen. He hovered over the button for a minute until curiosity took over and he opened the message. There were two messages there. 'Hey. You okay? I miss you' the older man's heart skipped a beat. A smile began to grow across his face but was stopped as he read the next message 'sorry, shouldn't have said that'. He had enough of waiting. He pushed his phone into his Jean's pocket and walked to the Beales. Surprisingly, Ian answered the door. A look of confusion and many questions flashed across his features before he greeted Callum and invited him in. "House seems quiet" "Yeah" Ian answered dryly, expression of confusion making another appearance. "Is Ben here?" Callum asked after a moment of Ian just staring. "No, he doesn't live here anymore" "What?" A Lot more has changed then he once thought. "Yeah. him, lola, lexi and kathy swanned off to Phil's after I let Sharon stay here" "Hold on, Ben is staying at Phil's?" "Yeah, that's what I just said" "I need to go" without waiting for a response, callum fled to the door and shouted over his shoulder a thank you before rushing to the Mitchell's. Callum new that if Ben was going off the rails, the best place for him to be was not with his dad.   
Reaching the Mitchell residence, he banged on the door he was greeted by Louise cradling young Peggy. "Callum, you came," louise said while whipping a tear from her cheek. "Lou, what's happened? Your crying" "I was talking to ben about you and how you will be there for him if he asks and he got angry and   
shouted and then stormed off" "Oh, right. Lou I need you to calm down. I'm going to see Ben now. You concentrate on Peggy, who is beautiful by the way, and I'll sort this out okay?" "Okay" If Ben was angry there was one place he would be...


	3. Hey there stranger

Callum reached the car lot in record time and surely enough, the light inside was on and the door was locked. He nocked. Once. Twice. Three times until eventually Ben arose from his place on the floor and opened the door. "Can you read, we are clos- Callum?" Callum could see Ben's eye glaze over and his cheeks become red hot under Ben's stare. "Can I come in? I'm freezing out here" Callum asked with a half smile. Ben quickly rubbed his tear soaked eyes and face and stepped aside. "What are you doing here? You said you weren't coming back? I-" Callum cut him off "No, I asked if there was a reason for me to come back you said not on your account." Ben just stared at his feet and played with his fingers. "Wow, Ben Mitchell with nothing to say" callum huffed and sat down. Ben carefully sat himself on the other end of sofa away from callum. He so desperately wanted to reach out, cuddle into to callum and apologise but he knew he couldn't. "I'm sorry........" Ben said, merely a whisper. "Ben, I don't want to hear that you are sorry, that means nowt to me." Another moment passed of the two sat in quiet. It wasn't the same quiet that would fall over them before. It wasn't soft and comfortable and felt like coming home, it was filled with tension and unspoken words. "Why are you back?" Ben whispered again, not looking up from his lap. "My only family is here, my jobs, friends" "Oh" Ben took a chance of looking up and saw Callum looking straight back at him. Like a deer in headlights, he shied away. Never in his life would he think that someone would be able to do what Callum has done and is doing, get under his skin. Callum sighed. "Lou called me. Said you are going back to how you were before." Ben's head shot up. "What, so you came here just to lecture me like the others!?" He instantly regretted it as hurt registered on Callum's face. "I care to much about you to sit back and watch." "Its for the best...." "For the best!?" Callum stood up now. "I loved you ben!" Ben glanced up "loved?" "Love. It doesn't just appear and disappear like that! I'm so sick and tired of people thinking they know what's best for me. I'm 28 years old! I'm not a kid ben. I don't need to be sheltered or hidden away from anything." "I couldn't ruin you, Callum" "Ben! I was a soldier! I was abused as a kid, I was bullied, I was shot, I was in an explosion! Fuck, I even got arrested for ABH! I don't need protection from what you do!" "You got arrested?" "Yes ben. I was so angry and upset and hit Leo by the vic. My world is not just unicorns and rainbows. I have been through hell and I deserve to be happy and if that's with you then" "But I'll hurt you, Callum!" Ben was now standing too. "Then hurt me! I love you ben! I want to be with you! Your hurting me now more than I ever have been hurt before! I want you!" Callum strode over to ben and took his head in his hands like he did the night his world fell apart. After there was no response from Ben callum stepped back and left. "'Ave a nice life Ben" he was gone. As the door shut, Ben just stared at where the person he cared about so much once stood.   
"I do love you....." he whispered before crumbling to the floor once more.


	4. So?

Callum walked into the middle of Albert Square and couldn't hold it in anymore. He broke down and collapsed onto a bench. He didn't care if his hair was a mess, he didn't care that he couldn't feel his feet because of the cold, he didn't care about the cold wind hitting his face and stinging where his tears were falling. After only 5 minutes but what felt like hours, he composed himself as best as possible and strides over to the vic. Once there he fell into a booth. He ordered a pint and allowed himself to drown his sorrows. It felt like half the square was there. Lou, Denny and Phil claimed a table by the door, Karen and Mitch were close to the bar talking to Mick, Jay and Lola were ordering drinks and Patrick was sitting with Denise and jack. He made sure he was tucked away from prying eyes; he didn't feel like talking, not now. While he stared at the condensation on his glass, he heard the doors open. He didn't bother to look up until he heard the person's voice. He could recognise that voice miles off. "Not now dad" He was here. Oh no.   
Ben had finished his "pity party" as he had dubbed it, he knew he had to do something, anything to get Callum back, his callum. He brushed himself off, stood up and walked to his house and rushed to his room. He grabbed a box from under his bed and took a few things from it before returning it to its place. He threw on a very particular shirt, pair of jeans and jacket before fleeing to the vic. It was now or never.   
A cold breeze entered the vic as Ben stumbled in, legs now gone to jelly as he spotted callum in the corner. "Ben! Where have you got off to?" "Not now dad" ben replied sternly before walking over to callum. "Ben, you've done what you've done now just, go" Callum was drained so didn't give up much of a fight as Ben began to talk. "When I came here I had a plan. I would get the money I needed and leave. That was it. But then, I came in here, saw you, and didn't know what to do. I hadn't even had a proper conversation with you and I was head of heels. You came into my life so fast I didn't know what to do. You got under my skin, Callum highway. Those months were you were still with Whitney were hell." Everyone in the vic was looking now making both of the boys go red under all the attention but Ben was not backing down, not now. "I wanted to be with you so badly I waited for you to be ready. I deleted my app because it felt like I was cheating on you even though we weren't together. I was like a teenager. When I got shot," callums eyes began to swell with tears as he thought back to that day. "You were the reason I got through it, and Sonia of course, but you kept me talking and I kept fighting for you. Since then we have made so many memories that I will keep with me all my days in so few days. I bought three new shirts for our first attempt at a date," ben pulled out a receipt from his pocket and placed it on the table. "We had our first meal together that you cooked" he placed a dried up rose head on the table that Callum had got him "we went on our first proper date out" he placed more and more items on the table, resembling all their milestones. "Ben i-" "I'm not done yet. You mean the world to me, callum highway. Your a tattoo I get erase, you came into my world like a tornado and changed everything!" Ben moved to sit next to Callum and took his hand in his. "I tried to be better for you and my daughter. I became a better person because of you. I don't want to hurt you and I don't want you to hurt now. I didn't mean what I said before christmas. I want your love, I want you! I-I" "Ben you don't have to do this for me if you're not ready" "No, no I am and I do, I owe it to you and I mean it. I love you callum highway and I have loved you,   
probably since I called you kermit" they both laughed now. "So?" Callum questioned "So?" "So, what do you do now?" A smirk played on Calum's lips. Ben then realised what he needed to do. He dramatically cleared his throat and stood once more placing an arm behind his back. "Will thy, sir Callum Jonathan Highway," "Your middle name is Jonathan!?" Mick chipped from behind the bar. "No, of course not!" Callum chuckled before redirecting his attention to the man in front of him. "So, will thy, sir Callum Highway, take me, Ben Mitchell, back?" He added a bow for dramatic effect. "Hmmm, let me think" callum looked up and around as to think about him answer. "Oh, come on callum! That was a 5 star performance! If you don't take him back I will!" Shouted Lola from the other side of the bar. "Of course I will you muppet!" A huge smile grew on both the lovers faces. "Yeah?" Ben asked. "Yeah" the whole bar cheered as the two shared a tender kiss full of love, emotion and promises. They stayed in the bar until closing, unable to keep their hands of each other, chatting and talking with their friends. As they stumbled out, arm in arm, Ben rested his head on Callums shoulder and they both eased into one another touch. "So, Callum Highway, let me show you what we have Both been missing" Ben joked as he dragged Callum back to his room in a fit of giggles. This night, was the start of a new.


End file.
